Living Life as Jayden's Mommy….

I have fallen in love with 2 items on ebay. I am also trying to think if I can get some wonderful family members to pay for them… anyways here are my 2 current fascinations….

We would get it personalized with the last name since this is the only set Mommy plans to purchase as far as baby rooms go anyway. The clock is $15.99 plus $7.00 shipping.

These are the matching wall letters but since I am going to use the letters for him as a toddler too and may get a new set perhaps I should get just a plain color but these letters are $8.50 each and I need 6. YIKES!!!!

Conversation with guidance counselor (she gives good guidance to the adults and students!)

Me: My husband said he likes me like this… and then I frown

Guidance Counselor: Why?

Me: I don’t know.. we can’t do anything (you know be intimate and all) … and I can’t do anything for myself either and I am tired of it.

Guidance Counselor: Well, I don’t know about you but I am ready to have this over with

Me: Me too and I hate to break it to hubby but I am not going to be pregnant all the time!

Just reflecting I guess I should be happy to still be attractive while I am huge but I am not… I miss my old shape and being able to bend over and eat to live and sleep on my tummy! Hubby has decided he wants an orchestra (in children) and I told him that was cool- he can just pay for one. I have decided (unlike Mrs. T and Smidgen) that I am willing to go for 3 of my own and then we still have Katie. She wants a sister and I want her to have one. So hopefully after Jayden we will have our Ashlynne and then this Mommy will be done. But if not and we have another son, we might have a ______ (no name but it has to end in the “n” sound and have a “y” in it.) But we are leaving it in God’s hands.

OK so now so many people all over are in job limbo. It is a HORRIBLE feeling. I feel blessed to have a job where I am. The people I work with (minus a couple) are pretty fantastic! But I know that God is going to work out the situation for me and hubby to raise Jayden together.

That is all… there isn’t anymore.

He is sooo worthy to be praised all the time but I have been fussing at hubby that I did not want anything else in my name or my credit until my credit score was readjusted (every 3 months on www.mycreditinform.com). He was not happy but dealt with it so… I was a 763 the last 3 months because I got a credit card and bought some furniture and had a high balance on my credit card (over $1k even though I pay it off at the end of the month!) anyways- all negative factors. So I have been praying and it honestly drove me insane that my 763 was only good versus excellent. I strive for excellence. I want to be one of the best… so I got my wonderful e-mail today that said it was updated… I was sooo antsy about checking it… but I did and low and behold I was soooo pleased to see my new fabulous number….. it is higher in case you had doubts smidgen! Ok so you want me to share? Really? Drum roll….

Hmm… should I really share that number?

I think it will be ok…

Perhaps I should wait for another day to draw more readers.. ha ha.. kidding! The new number is 792!!!! 850 is the best and I am well on my way to that but with this # I know we will have a good interest rate on a home and get that credit plus I hooked hubby to my credit card so his score will go up too since I paid the balance! Oh happy day!!!

Ok that is all there isn’t anymore…

Oh yes and THANKS soooo much to those that have been commenting. At 32 weeks (today) it is just exciting to get an e-mail saying that someone has commented. It is like a present everyday. I don’t mind adding you to my blog roll either if you will add me to yours so just let me know! (to all of you not getting my subtle hint- freakin’ comment sometime geesh!!!)

That is all… there isn’t anymore!

Well it was the best of times and the worst of times… lol. Just kidding. It was a relaxing week. Hubby was very attentive and I wasn’t much help around the house so I rested. I guess I never thought I wouldn’t be able to bend over anymore but it is becoming more of a struggle.

We did go house hunting and I fell in love with an open kitchen concept and it is now on the list as = non-negotiable and a NEED. Hubby has found a house that is extremely high priced that he likes so WHEN (positive thinking and praying) I get my position in Mobile we can reevaluate finances and options and negotiate the price with a lower offer and maybe we will get it.

I returned to work today and it was not a bad day. I had one rowdy class and once I reminded them that we had things to do and they would suffer consequences more than I- they settled right down.

I had a nice discussion with my Mother-in-Law too that I will not rehash since I have shared with Mrs. T. from work and Smidgen in emergency phone calls. I guess we have come to the conclusion it is a power struggle. Which is dumb because duh- my house, my hubby, my rules- I win hands down. Don’t MIL’s know that DIL (daughters) have a lot of power and can make life worse for them??? I mean geesh- use some common sense. I didn’t appreciate her tone nor her words nor the fact that I had to defend her son who is currently giving her money to her. I do not like for people to tell me to step up to the plate in an area when they have fallen behind in several of their own areas- it is just tacky!!!! GRRRR… anyway bottom line is that I don’t have much to say to her, my hubby and his ex will be making decisions about their daughter and hubby and I will be making decisions about Jayden and that is how that will work. It is not up for discussion. Furthermore it is not MY responsibility to take care of a child that I never see nor hear from, especially when she has a Mother who has done a not so bad job with her up to this point! *Blood pressure rising*
Anyways- there is no competition between children. If my child needs something then I will go without so that he can have because that is what a real Mother does- I can’t control what other people do.

My Seniors only have 27 days left of class (excluding weekends) that is exciting because I only teach 1 class after that! I have a dr. appointment Thursday and get my 4d pic or whatever it is that cost me $150 on sale (I think I was under the influence of shock from finding out I was pregnant or something when I agreed to pay for that and got hubby to go 1/2) but I will attempt to scan that and post. I think he has Daddy’s head and nose. I will cry if it does not resemble me at all… I mean geesh can I get a feature… of course the brain power thing he is covered on! I am soooo modest!

Ok it is late and my baby is moving funky. Every time he rolls or moves his arm fast or something I get that “lost your tummy” feeling so I am going to get him and me to bed so that he can get some sleep. He likes to be up more nowadays- I hope that is not a sign of what is to come… I look forward to a relaxed and peace seeking child.. lol

Well thanks for listening and have a good night!

That is all… there isn’t anymore.

I say that because I am encouraged… listening to my favorite Christian Cd (even though it is a bootleg copy that I made… he he) I can honestly say that I know God has a plan. Song #1 says “No weapon formed against me shall prosper.” I believe that… and have seen it play out which is even more awesome. Then song #2 is Bebe and Cece (all you that listen to African American gospel know I am talking about the Winans- love them!) and it is old school but “Addicted Love” is the bomb and I can sing it all the way through….

Ok so I got an e-mail from my cuz today about a cute little story… I won’t post the story but essentially this was the caption at the end and I felt encouraged enough to share it with every one of my readers:

Philppians 4:13 — I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.

The road to success is not straight. There is a curve called Failure, a loop called Confusion, speed bumps called
Friends, red lights called Enemies, caution lights called Family. You will have flats called Jobs. But, if you have a spare called Determination, an engine called Perseverance, insurance called Faith, a driver called Jesus, you will make it to a place called Success.

Is that not just awesome?

Ok now for real talk… I am 29 weeks today.. I thought this day would come much later for some reason. I go to the doc again for a sugar check on Friday. I am very antsy about what will become of me… birth, working situation, living situation, etc. I did talk to my Mom and figured out that if we continue to live where we are (hubby and I) we could live on savings and him working and I could stay at home if that is what we want to do. I was soooo against it and as time marches on I am feeling it more. I feel I need a break from the classroom. Then again I am eager to spend the summer taking care of my little one as many mommies tell me that they were eager to head back to work so that they could get a break. I am also concerned about the birthing process. Now I have 2 fibroids and although the doc said he had plenty of room, I feel sorry for Jayden having to share me with them! (Spoken like a true Mommy). I think I am going to buy my stuff from Target next week- at least the travel system anyways. My mom is buying the bassinet thing I picked out and I think my sis is buying the bouncy seat thing or something. Then of course with 2 Godmommies that are extremely excited and a future Goddaddy- Jayden will be ready and met with love! Ok so I am nervous about birth… I pray that it lasts a little while, I get an epidural (sp?) and then have the baby naturally. I don’t want a C-section because I want to walk out of the hospital. I am open to having more children as this pregnancy has not been the easiest but not so bad that I don’t want to go through it again… *sigh* and next time we hope for an Ashlynne Nechele and then this Mommy will be done!

Well thanks for listening. I am antsy… I snap at students a lot and then of course the class chorus now is “She is pregnant!” And I always add, “yeah, I am pregnant!” It is almost a joke but they know I enjoy them it is just getting difficult. My emotions are up and down and I have to be careful who I talk to and when because I can’t really be there for them like I once was… in other words it is my turn to be selfish! Very seldom do I want to hear about anyone else’s issues… I want to say my stuff… may or may not want feedback and then I want to go to sleep. I have told hubby once or twice that I just want him to listen and don’t offer an opinion… he laughed in shock but listened as I reminded him that I am pregnant and need his support!

I am stopping now before I get too caught up. If you care to add a comment, please do… until next time America…lol…

That is all….. there isn’t anymore…

Well I am not in the best of spirits today.. I guess emotions are bothering me now… I dunno… anyways… I have decided against 2 themes for my little one:

1. No Monkeys…. My Mom laughed when I told her that my child would not be wearing monkeys or looking at them in his room. I told her that it was because of the associations made between black people and monkeys. It just made my face frown when I saw them and thought of my baby wearing them. She said that I need to be bigger than that. I did not argue but told her that me, my sister and cousin San would be buying clothes for the baby and between the 3 of us- we know the rules… NO MONKEYS!!!!

2. No Winnie the Pooh… yes my dear cousin San did recommend that theme. I told her that I would not be  sponsoring Winnie in my baby’s room or on his gear mainly because he misspells “Hunny.” It is absolutely ANNOYING! Some say that is something that would be said by a teacher BUT I don’t care- no way is my child going to look at a misspelled word day in and day out. Not only is it misspelled but I do believe one of the letters is even written backwards… talk about a bad start… geesh… One African American comedian did say that Winnie the Pooh was teaching our young men to be gay. I just about died laughing at the thought of such. He went on to say… that Winnie the Pooh is a male with the name “Winnie” running through the forest with a t-shirt on looking for a white boy. It had me rolling on the floor laughing .. ok not literally… too hard to get on the floor and then get up… so I laughed until I cried… and so did my Mom… all my friends laughed too because they said I was crazy but I don’t care. No WINNIE THE POOH!!!!

 Okay so what is all the angst about? Well I guess it is not knowing. I HATE being in wonder of what I will be doing. I am getting a new baby and that is exciting but then comes the reality of raising it and having to leave my friends and family here for better opportunities. I would like to stay here for a year or 2 because the job would be easier but hubby’s music stuff is there. It just truly sucks that he can’t do the same thing here as there… grrrrr. Anyways this is how God makes us grow. He tests us. He knows that I have to trust in him to work it all out. He will and I just have to believe at this point. There is nothing I can do but wait.

Sigh… that is all, there isn’t any more…..

1. You think that just because my hubby plays gigs and is not able to come visit every week that our marriage is set for disaster, well bless your heart.

2. You think it is crazy that I write, call, and blog my one friend that seems to be allergic to the phone because I have not heard from her in 3 weeks and it is NOT totally out of the ordinary for her to disappear every now and then, well bless your heart.

3. You think it is wrong to tell people that I want gift cards for presents instead of tons and tons of diapers and wipes well bless your heart.

4. You don’t like my baby name even though you have had 3 sons and think you have found me a new name and can’t understand why I just don’t have much to say to you right now, well bless your heart.

5. You are jealous that my parents are taking care of me along with my hubby while I am pregnant, well bless your heart.

6. Your little sister does not take care of you and look out for you like mine even though we are not the closest sisters, well bless your heart.

7. I lose my job and all of a sudden all the freeloaders leave my home that they have lived in the past 7 -8 years and take their govt checks with them in my time of need and you think that is ok??? Well BLESS YOUR HEART!

I didn’t have much to go off about this week so I just did a few blasts… lol…

I got a leg cramp this morning upon getting out of the shower. It is horrible. My Mom even tried to knead it out and it is still there. I told her that it was under too much fat (yep, I have fat on my legs). Ok so now that you are all aware of that…

I am so glad I did not have to work or pull duty today- Hallelujah! I totally enjoy sitting home and keeping up with the news, banking, and bills. I think this will be a future career of mine right up there with Mom. Hmmm maybe I could keep kids with my own and charge $100 a week and keep 4 kids.. that would be cool. But then again I would actually have to keep the kids… maybe kids in pre-school but not babies. I want to just play and feed my own… ugh… I need a job in Mobile, Alabama. Perhaps someone will read this and get “Scrapper” a job! lol… Hey, stranger things have happened from the Internet!

Jayden is doing fine. I really like the name Jalen but there are just too doggone many. It is kind of fun looking at baby names and it is important to know the meaning. I am excited to have my Ashlynne one day though too. Ashlynne Nechele. It would be weird to find out that this is really a girl… it would also suck because I have bought boy stuff but I would welcome either… Jayden or Ashlynne – I mean how cute is that??? So we will have Kaitlyn, Jayden, and Ashlynne. Ok he was moving all last night while his Daddy was talking to me and today I guess since I am not talking a whole lot he has decided to sleep. Not much movement… ok. It is weird feeling him move, it is like butterflies/ gas or something and just feels different. I wonder if the kicking will hurt. I am eager to buy more clothes and have already looked on the Ralph Lauren site. I am not against hand me downs but I do want my child to have some things that are brand new and name brand too.

Mrs. T and I talked about formula, insurance, diapers, and daycare today! Yikes! All the stuff that will massively change your budget with a baby.

Ok Dr. Phil is on and my back is starting to ache and I need to do more laundry… the cycle never ends but I am feeling a nap today. I called Smidgen on the phone but there was no answer- guess she had to work- pity- ha, ha!!!!

Have a great President’s Day all!

Not too much happened. I taught most of the day. Had pizza at lunch, and then a fantastic dinner of spaghetti and broccoli and cheese.

Hubby and I are still talking about the whole house thing- I think we are just going to stick to prayer and let God lead us. That is what we are suppose to do anyways!

I have the dr. appt Thursday and I am still in prayer on that. Tonight it is 9 p.m. and I am falling asleep so.. I am headed that way. It is cold here. I can’t wait for winter clothes- brrrrrr.

I am going to do some elastic shopping cuz my clothes are getting tighter too.

Not much happened…. did 11 minutes on Wii Fit. I will have you know my age is 24 so I am balanced AND I gained weight although I am still underweight. Next, I totally enjoyed staying home and doing nothing. I spent Saturday eating and staying warm. Sunday we went to church with Daddy and then we visited my Dad’s uncle in the hospital. Of course by that time I was starving so I got to eat at Sunny’s- no ribs there but I did get the BBQ chicken and mac & cheese. Now I am watching my shows and headed to bed at 10 p.m.

I am keeping up with friends via the phone more on the weekends. So many call to check on me and my tummy adventures! lol… But that is cool. It makes me feel special.

Well Smidgen so graciously reminded OUR readers that I have a birthday this week. I will be remaining 25 on Thursday yet one more year. Since my sis has not caught me yet I think I am okay. I have a dr. appt that day with a pap and an ultrasound. I was nervous until I talked to Mrs. K who teaches at the other high school in my county. She assured me there was nothing to it I just needed to relax. Smidgen said the same thing… she is soooo brave and I am a wuss. But I am going to be an adult about it and keep praying for calmness and the ability to get through it. I believe I will have peace. All readers please pray that I will be okay too!

That is all. I do have a free rental this week from my local movie store so Wednesday, I am planning pizza and a movie with hubby- so exciting! lol… I am thinking Red Lobster with hubby and Mom on my b-day. Yes, my Mom is going to the doc with me again. And yes as long as I am here in town she will be planning to go to all at my request of course. I enjoy having my Mom there … hubby too… lol… I am spoiled, what can I say? I can say that I do hope to be able to be there for my own kids like my Mom has been there for me though. So that is my goal.

Okay well that is all, there isn’t anymore. One of my favorite quotes from Dr. Seuss.